Shoot for the Moon

Yes. I'm still here. For all three of you who check this. And for myself, because, after all, don't we have to remind ourselves every once in awhile that we're alive? Feeling alive is an incredibly powerful thing. Makes us believe in the power that is vested in us, in the ability we have to change not only what we have become, but our environment as well.

Charleston is going through a beautiful period right now. Spoleto USA (a yearly arts festival) is here... and the city is filled with artists and performances of all kinds. One gets a sense that people are receptive, for once, to change. Yesterday I went to see a drag queen show. Even though it was an absolutely terrible performance (because she did nothing but lipsynch and after awhile, living in NY desensitizes you to the novelty of physical difference) the audience loved it. The crowd was basically made up of what the queen called "uptown white bitches," the same ones I've been talking about in my posts every now and again. Anyway, everytime she called them that, they squealed with delight. Like they were proud to be "uptown white bitches" and didn't realize that, (ahem!) it wasn't a compliment. In any case, point is, the "bitches" came out. They left their Mt. Pleasant bubble (although not quite, because the performance was in a ritzy club) and saw something new. Oh, and P.S. where they live really is called Mt. Pleasant.

Everytime we experience something new, it forces us to widen that narrow lense in which we enclose our reality. That is the hope, at least. For me, the widening experience came when I went to see a company of Flamenco dancers two nights ago. Their talent was incredible. Aside from being the best possible cardio workout in the world, this form of dance was one of the most graceful and emotional types I have ever experienced. I seriously sat wide-eyed in the audience, absolutely amazed by the ability that this small company had to move me with them. I left euphoric... but also painfully aware of my own mediocrity. And it made me realize once and for ever, that I want to do something with my life. My goal extends beyond personal happiness, it reaches into the realm of action. To be a mover, to make a difference. It's what I've always wanted to achieve, but in the process of "growing up," I think I substituted "realism" with "idealism" and it seems that has messed up my recipe. Not to worry though, I'm going to get it back, put it in, do what I need to do so that I will become all I can be. Because at the end of the day, I expect that of myself. So, here I go -- shooting for the moon, trusting that I will fall somewhere among the stars.